


breathe in, hold it, hold it

by helloearthlings



Category: King Falls AM (Podcast)
Genre: Anxiety, F/M, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Canon, Separation Anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-17
Updated: 2018-05-17
Packaged: 2019-05-08 01:38:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14683731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helloearthlings/pseuds/helloearthlings
Summary: It was Sammy’s first night back on the air and Ben could tell he wasn’t doing well.He’d seemed okay before they started – more than okay, really. The four years’ worth of tension in Sammy’s body had somewhat dissolved in the past few weeks, ever since that night in Perdition Wood that Ben couldn’t think about without getting short of breath.But they’d succeeded, that was the important thing, Jack was the important thing, and Sammy had seemed truly happy and elated and relieved and shocked and overjoyed all at once whenever Ben saw him with Jack, glued to his side, over the past few weeks.Tonight though, back in studio, Jack wasn’t glued to his side. He wasn't there. And Ben knew it was going to be a problem.





	breathe in, hold it, hold it

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing something else about these same themes, then stopped and wrote this instead. Huh. Fun. I'm fun like that. This is the first real post-canon Jack-back thing I've written so that's exciting and all.
> 
> Maybe I'll finish the other thing, but in the meantime, please enjoy this!

It was Sammy’s first night back on the air and Ben could tell he wasn’t doing well.

He’d seemed okay before they started – more than okay, really. The four years’ worth of tension in Sammy’s body had somewhat dissolved in the past few weeks, ever since that night in Perdition Wood that Ben couldn’t think about without getting short of breath.

But they’d succeeded, that was the important thing, Jack was the important thing, and Sammy had seemed truly happy and elated and relieved and shocked and overjoyed all at once when Ben saw him with Jack, glued to his side, over the past few weeks.

Tonight though, back in studio, Jack wasn’t glued to his side. He wasn't there. And Ben knew it was going to be a problem.

Sammy’s usual radio-ready voice was more scattered than usual, which Ben had brushed off initially until Sammy’s breath continued to catch every other time he opened his mouth.

Then Ben started looking closer, saw that Sammy’s pupils were dilated, that his hands were clenched tightly, and that he was constantly looking at his phone, relaxing the tiniest bit only when he saw something on the screen.

Ever the consummate professional, that last one was especially out of character, but when Ben saw Jack’s name on one of the texts, the pieces slid into place pretty easily. Of course Sammy was worried about leaving Jack along – he probably hadn’t left his side once since he'd gotten Jack back on this plane of existence.

There were more than a few calls regarding Jack, with this being Sammy’s first night back and all, and Ben was going to tell them to stop being invasive but Sammy actually seemed to like the calls, or at least he’d breathe easier after someone else said Jack’s name – even if that someone else was Archie Simmons saying that he’d seen Jack and Sammy at the Bent and Dent and Jack was _spicy hot._

Which made Sammy turn all kinds of red and mutter about Jack’s ego not needing any help, and Ben thought maybe after that things were going to calm down, but they dissolved again within minutes. Sammy kept checking his phone, but wasn’t finding what he was looking for – presumably a text back from Jack – and his shoulders were getting tenser by the second.

It was a little before three when Ben finally decided to say “Hey folks, we’re gonna take a quick pause for the cause and pay a few bills. We’ll be back in a few.”

Sammy squinted up at him from across the table as Ben slid his headphones from off his ears to around his neck. “I thought a break wasn’t scheduled for another ten.”

“I thought maybe you’d like to call Jack,” Ben said, trying to brush off the sentiment as innocuous, like he had no idea that Sammy was panicking across from him, or at least they could pretend that Ben hadn’t noticed even if they both knew better.

Sammy bit his lip and Ben could tell he was debating how vulnerable he wanted to seem, but Ben wasn’t going to push him.

“Thanks,” Sammy finally said quietly after a second, shooting Ben a grateful smile as he pulled his phone out on his way out of the studio. Ben could hear the start of the conversation as Jack picked up. “Hey, sorry if I woke you up. No, it’s fine, you just weren’t replying and I was– yeah, we’re on break, I –”

Ben fiddled with his computer for a few minutes, trying not to listen in, and greeted the listening audience before Sammy was off the call.

The brief conversation helped for the next hour or so, the color back in Sammy’s cheeks, and he even managed to have a few joking conversations where he seemed light and happy, but he was still constantly checking his phone.

Figuring Sammy couldn’t call him out for being unprofessional, Ben got his phone out under the table and shot a quick text to Jack as well.

_Don’t know if you’re listening, but can you call in? Think it would help him a lot._

A few minutes later, Ben saw a new notification pop up.

_Dialing you up now._

“Line seven, you’re live on King Falls AM,” Sammy said a little more than ten minutes later, after Ben had desperately tried to pawn off an endless Doyle call about the new blender Riley bought him blending together the apparitions of the building into one large super apparition.

“Hey, so I hear I’m being gossiped about,” Jack’s voice fed into the headphones and Ben could see the tension melt away from Sammy’s face as he smiled, small and embarrassed but overwhelmingly happy. Ben wondered if that was what he looked like whenever Emily called in, and decided that the retching noises Sammy used to make at him on breaks were probably entirely warranted.

“Well, ladies and gents, I guess you’re finally gonna get your wish,” Sammy shook his head, giving Ben a look like he knew he was going to get crap about this tomorrow. “May I introduce to you Mr. Jack Wright.”

“Thank you for that very _professional_ introduction,” Jack’s laugh filtered through. “Hey Ben, how’s it going?”

“Better now with you here,” Ben said, because it was. It was also the first thing he’d said to Jack, at least in this plane of existence, after they’d pulled Jack through the quickly closing portal between the worlds.

“Flatterer,” Sammy said with a roll of his eyes in Ben’s direction.

“Hey, I hear Archie Simmons is the real flatterer here,” Jack said and Sammy groaned, loud and dramatic.

“Don’t encourage Archie,” Sammy said. “He has enough of that from Sheila and the rest of his gossip circle.”

“I’m sure they’ve all been on Neighborhood Watch: Jack Wright Edition all week,” Ben laughed. “Just waiting to catch a glimpse.”

“Yes, I’m famous, apparently,” Jack said dryly but not without affection even though Ben knew it was a hell of an adjustment for him not just to be back in _a_ life in general, but to be in a town where almost everyone knew his name before they met him, along with pieces of his past that Ben was sure Jack wished weren’t out in the open.

 _Just different,_ is what Jack had called it during his and Ben’s brief and only conversation alone a couple of weeks ago, when Sammy and Lily had gone into the kitchen to argue about making dinner. _Better, I think. Sammy seems much more…comfortable with himself. And I love that you’ve been here for him. And that the town has been behind him. But – it’s odd. Living behind closed doors for so long only to find myself here._

“So as a new King Falls resident, how are you liking the town, Jack?” Ben said, more to do a bit than anything, since he’d quickly learned that he and Jack had very similar senses of humor that primarily revolved around making oblique references to TV shows no one else watched and making fun of Sammy.

“You know, anything beats the place I lived before,” Jack chuckled, his voice very light and teasing. “It’s definitely sunnier here. Rainbow lights beat endless shadows any day in my book.”

“That isn’t something to joke about,” Sammy groaned as Ben laughed along with Jack. “You guys suck. Jack, did you have any particular reason for calling in, other than to enjoy the attention you’re getting?”

“I can’t call in just to say hi?” Jack asked. “Gonna make for a real awkward marriage if I can’t do that.”

Sammy turned about eight different shades of red. “Oh yeah, mention marriage. That’s _definitely_ going to stop the rumor mill. Now I’ll be getting calls about how cute we are. It’ll be super gross.”

Sammy’s voice didn’t make it sound gross; he sounded like he was almost looking forward to it, his eyes soft around the edges.

Ben realized a little too late that Sammy and Jack had never talked like this on the radio before. He’d gleaned from the information that Sammy was willing to divulge that he and Jack had been doing radio together for nearly ten years before – well, _before_ , and never once had they been able to talk to each other like this.

“I’m sure Cynthia will call in and ruin the feel-good mood, so don’t worry too much about fending off admirers,” Ben piped up when Sammy was practically making heart-eyes at the microphone in lieu of Jack actually being there to moon over.

Ben made a mental note to make sure that Jack was there to be mooned over in person tomorrow night. He had offered to Sammy that Jack could come in studio, whether to be on the show or not, but that had been during a bad couple of days with Jack’s health, and even though they were in a decent period right now, it was always a worry, and Sammy said he wanted to make sure Jack had the chance to sleep and didn’t have the pressure of the studio anytime soon.

But in Ben’s humble opinion, Sammy’s well-being was just as important as Jack’s, and Jack seemed more than happy to call in so maybe he wouldn’t mind hanging out at least for a couple hours tomorrow.

“I’ll let you get back to your regularly scheduled broadcast,” Jack said after Sammy made a disgruntled noise as the mention of Cynthia that she was sure to call in and complain about soon. “Just wanted to say hi and make sure everything was going alright.”

Sammy awkwardly brushed his hair out of his face, probably knowing full well that he hadn’t sounded top-notch before this point. “Yeah, get some sleep. Turn this garbage off, it’s only going to boost your ego to unimaginable heights.”

“Will do,” Jack said. “Night, Ben. Night, listeners who find me attractive and want to tell Sammy about it. I appreciate it even if he doesn’t.”

“Whatever,” Sammy rolled his eyes again, but his smile gave him away. The line went dead a moment and Ben cut away to commercial.

“Did that help?” Ben asked, not wanting to be too blunt about noticing Sammy’s vulnerabilities but still wanting his best friend to know that he would be watching out for him no matter what.

“Yeah, I wasn’t expecting him to –” Sammy cut himself off and narrowed his eyes in Ben’s direction. “You told him to call, didn’t you?”

“I…may have,” Ben said carefully, though Sammy seemed much more exasperated than upset about it.

“Of course you did,” Sammy huffed. “And… I appreciate it.”

“Whatever you need, man,” Ben said in all seriousness. “You need more time off, you take it, alright? Or if you want him in studio all the time, that’s totally cool. Jack’s awesome, I’d love to hang out with him every night.”

“I just worry,” Sammy said quietly, “when I’m not with him. That’s all.”

“Because…he was literally snatched out of the air before,” Ben said slowly, working through it in his mind. Right after Emily returned, Ben had nearly gone out of his mind when he hadn’t been able to see her. But at least he would know if the rainbow lights made a reappearance near her. Jack was literally gone in an instant from his driveway with no explanation whatsoever, and the Void could easily do something like that at any time, to anyone.

Now Ben was starting to feel anxious about Jack not being there. The Void certainly hadn’t given him up without a hell of a fight.

“Yeah,” Sammy said, his mouth twisting unpleasantly. “That and I just – I think it might all just be a dream, that I’ll wake up and – and this won’t have happened, that it’ll still be like it was before, that he was never here – I never found him –”

Sammy’s hands started shaking again, the misery on his face evident as he hunched in on himself, not making eye contact with Ben.

Ben reached across the table to squeeze Sammy’s wrist. “Tell me what I can do to help and I’ll do it. Okay? Or Emily will. Or Troy will. Or any of the countless listeners who think your fiancé is super hot will. Also, I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this before, but Jack _is_ extremely attractive. Where’d you find a guy like that, anyway?”

“Not you, too!” Sammy shoved at Ben, disgruntled, as Ben laughed. The commercial came to an end, and Sammy rolled his eyes so far back into his head that Ben couldn’t see them anymore as he said “Folks, you just missed _Ben_ of all people waxing poetic about Jack’s good looks. Emily, call in and control this.”

“Oh, Emily thinks he’s hot too, she already told me,” Ben said, holding in a laugh at the look of pure disgust on Sammy’s face.

“I can’t believe you’re betraying me like this, Emily,” Sammy shook his head in mock-disappointment. “Ben? Sure. But you?”

“What the hell do you mean _Ben? Sur_ e? _”_ Ben kicked Sammy’s leg under the table. “All I did was bring up the fact that the listeners are in fact right and Jack is hot. Also, don’t pretend you don’t agree with us.”

“Obviously I agree,” Sammy said. “I just don’t think it needs to be said with such frequency. Jack already knows he’s hot. How would you feel if half the town talked about how hot Emily is?”

“I would join in the conversation,” Ben deadpanned and it was Sammy who kicked his legs this time, but repeatedly until Ben started snickering and pulled them up to his chest to avoid the onslaught.

Sammy was mostly okay after that, mainly because almost everyone who called in after that mentioned Jack in some capacity or another, and almost always to tell Sammy how much happier he sounded, which made Sammy blush and stammer more than Ben had ever seen him. Making fun of him for it also helped distract him from his potential panic, which Ben was more than happy to do.

He got another text from Jack a quarter after five during a distinctly humorous call with The Dark who assumed that Sammy was cheating on Ben because the guy still somehow thought the two of them were together even though it seemed like all they talked about on the show for ages now was either Emily or Jack.

_Hey, I’m driving up the mountain with Emily. If Sammy’s alright, don’t tell him – want to surprise him. But if he’s doing badly you can tell him I’m coming._

Ben looked on as Sammy, face scrunched up in complete awkwardness said, “Yeah, Dark, I love Ben _as a friend!_ Do you understand the concept of friendship? Is that beyond your superhuman capabilities? Do I need to spell out it for? I’m pretty sure SpongeBob even sings a song about it!”

_I think he’s doing fine now. But it’s great you’re coming up – tell Em hi!!!_

Emily and Jack had bonded in very similar ways that Ben and Jack bonded – over mutual lost time and missing memories but also a love of books, natural athleticism, and making fun of Sammy – and it made Ben happier than he could possibly express that Jack fit in so well with their little family.

Ben heard their call pull up about fifteen minutes before the show was scheduled to end. Sammy, whose twitchy fingers had been all over his phone for the past few minutes, looked up when he saw the headlights.

“Folks, I think we’re getting company at the station – hopefully not of the Gunderson and Goons variety, but we’ll keep you posted,” Sammy said, shooting Ben a questioning look. “Ben, do we have any last-minute interviews I haven’t been made aware of?”

“Nope, we’re done for the night as far as interviews go,” Ben said, feigning casualness, though Sammy’s narrowed eyes said that Ben was very bad at it. “Maybe it’s…”

He trailed off purposefully, fiddling with his thumbs as Sammy half-glared at him. “Stop pretending to be interesting and tell me.”

Ben didn’t have the chance to, since Emily poked her head into the studio door a second later. “Surprise!”

“Well folks, you’re in for a treat, as the lovely Miss Emily Potter…” Sammy trailed off himself, his eyes pointedly fixed on the spot above Emily’s shoulder where Jack had just stuck his head in as well with a sheepish grin. “…as the lovely Miss Emily Potter just entered the studio with King Falls’ Next Top Model, Jack Wright.”

“Sarcasm’s unattractive,” Jack chuckled as he followed Emily into the room. Emily immediately came over to kiss Ben hello, which was very appreciated. Jack awkwardly stood next to Sammy and punched his shoulder and Sammy punched him back.

They probably weren’t used to being affectionate in radio stations. It made Ben more than a little sad, but he reminded himself that everything was going to get better now for the two of them, and if it didn’t then Ben would make it better, because that was what Ben did.

“Apparently it’s not since half this town is _fawning_ over you,” Sammy sniped, and he made a motion like he was going to hold Jack’s hand but instead just touched their fingers together for half a second.

“They do it because they care,” Emily said, her hand brushing the back of Ben’s neck as she leaned over into the microphone to be sure that the audience could hear. “They just want to show their support, and I think Archie started the bandwagon of this particular kind of… _support_.”

“Naturally it’s all your fault, Archie,” Sammy said, not with affection. “Lucky for me, we are out of time for the evening. Please tune back in tomorrow night with a little less thirst for my – for my fiancé, please.”

Jack squeezed Sammy’s shoulder as Sammy wrung his hands together, a nervous smile on his face presumably at being able to get those words out.

“Night, King Falls!” Ben said as he flipped on a final commercial, giving a wave to the early morning guy in the other room that he was good to come inside whenever he wanted.

“What are you guys doing here?” Sammy asked as he grabbed his backpack off the floor, he and Jack following Ben and Emily out into the lobby and then into their office so Ben could grab all his shit for day.

“We just thought it’d be fun to come see you on your first night back,” Emily said cheerily, not giving away any possible ulterior motives that had to do with Sammy’s anxiety.

“You should be sleeping,” Sammy said quietly to Jack, though it clearly wasn’t a private conversation.

“Couldn’t sleep with you texting me every other second,” Jack said it with a smile but the expression on Sammy’s face immediately turned guilty.

“I didn’t mean to – I won’t do it again, I –” Sammy started, looking a little panicked.

“Jack can always stay with me when you’re on the air and he wants to sleep,” Emily said, leaving little room for argument. “I don’t like being alone either.”

“If Jack wants,” Sammy sighed, his shoulders rolling back as he smiled gratefully over at Emily.

“I’m not really the one I’m concerned about,” Jack said slowly, eyes flickering over to Ben and Emily as if he didn’t know if he should say this in front of them, but hopefully the last few weeks had taught him that Ben and Emily loved Sammy just as much as he did. “Sammy – it’s alright. I know you’re panicking when I’m not here –”

“I just – you’re the one who’s recovering from a literal nightmare void and _I’m_ the one who can’t cope,” Sammy said with a sardonic shake of his head. “Fucking ironic.”

“I can stay with Emily – hell, I can come into the studio. My health isn’t bad enough for that, even if it’ll probably be touch and go for a while,” Jack said firmly, also not giving Sammy an inch to argue. “I can sleep in this office, it’s fine.”

“What, on my spindly office chair?” Sammy asked with an eye roll, but his voice was quiet enough that he knew perfectly well that this wasn’t worth arguing.

“Worth it to keep you calm,” Jack said, his smile soft but still wide as he squeezed Sammy’s shoulder again.

“I’ll move a couch in here for you,” Ben told Jack, thinking of the extra loveseat in his mom’s house and knowing that she’d love an excuse to sell it. “That way you can sleep and Sammy can come in and check on you whenever he starts panicking. Best of both worlds. No arguing, Sammy.”

Sammy gave Ben a look that was somewhere torn between annoyed and beyond grateful, a look Ben had grown very used to over the past four years.

Ben moved the couch up before their show the next week.

Sammy checked on Jack no less than twenty-three times, but his voice never wavered once.


End file.
